Streaker Makes Naked Run Through Campus

Students reported seeing a man streaking naked across campus during lunch between 12:20 and 12:30 p.m. Friday, May 22. The incident occurred at the same time as the final rounds of the school’s dodgeball tournament in the gym.

Waving a Russian flag and sporting a “Scream” mask, the white male displayed “’09”on his buttocks in green ink, say many students. According to junior Maxine Sferra, the man graduated high school last year but was never a student at the school. The streaker’s identity has not been confirmed, but he is believed to be the same man who streaked across campus in 2007.

According to Principal Wynne Satterwhite, the administration notified the Los Altos Police Department immediately after his appearance.

“We’re in the process of investigating right now,” Satterwhite said. “Indecent exposure is against the law, and that was pretty indecent.”

According to freshman Danny Duperrault, the streaker entered the school from between the administrative buildings and the library.

“Me and my friends were sitting on the grass,” Danny said. “None of us really said anything until he was past our site … my friends were like ‘Oh, dude. There’s a streaker!’”

The streaker then cut across the quad towards the gym, according to senior Rufus Gorkhali, who had been sitting on the steps of the math building at the time.

“At first I heard some commotion so I looked toward the quad,” Rufus said. “I saw this person from the distance running, but I couldn’t tell he was naked. And when he was facing directly at me and running towards me, I was completely shocked and traumatized and I was about to throw up.”

The streaker’s run ended when he exited the school through the tennis courts, and according to Danny, entered a car which was waiting for him. Students had varied responses to the streaker.

“I missed it last year, so I’m really glad I saw it this year,” Sarah said.

Rufus reacted differently.

“I think it’s really stupid” Rufus said. “People shouldn’t do this because it ruins the decency of the school.”

Comments

1

Anonymous

May 22, 2009

Our preconceived notions of “decency” demand that nudity is immoral. Not only is there absolutely no logic behind this belief, but it is what provokes streaking.

Seeing a nude man once in the year is not going to “traumatize” you. Roughly half of humanity has a penis.

Get over it and enjoy a well-executed prank. The administration will continue to pursue him because it’s their job, but the students don’t need to claim they’re revolted because they’re not used to public nudity.

2

Anonymous

May 22, 2009

I’m not excited about seeing a naked guy running through the school. It’s just cool to have seen it so when someone says “Hey remember that streaker that one time?” I don’t feel lame for missing it. Just clarification haha.

3

Anonymous

May 22, 2009

Whoever this rufus guy is, he needs a little fun and humour in his life.
The ‘Streaker’ adds a little unexpected excitement,
to a boring, old-routined highschool.

I would know. I was enrolled there, and saw him in 07.
Which seriously made me “LMAO”. Long Live The Streaker :P

4

Anonymous

May 22, 2009

I wonder if Rufus is traumatized every single time he’s in the shower too. It’s a naked guy, relax.

5

Anonymous

May 23, 2009

Ok guys, let me say this again. It WAS very stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid. There is nothing funny about a streaker, unless he is small. Grow up you anonymous fools, and keep your pants on.

Cheers,
Rufus

6

Anonymous

May 23, 2009

Streaking is technically a sex crime, and if you get convicted you become a registered sex offender and your name goes up on those neighborhood sex offender websites. Can you believe that??

7

Anonymous

May 23, 2009

I understand what you’re saying “Rufus”, but there really is no harm done.
Now, if he stopped at forced people to look at it, then maybe there would be, but you didn’t have to look if you didn’t want to. It’s a streaker, not a rapist.

8

Anonymous

May 24, 2009

Whoever you are need to chill out. Obviously the words are sorta exaggerated. I think that may be u are the streaker… if u want excitement go to great america.
And trust me i have plenty of things in life that keeps me excited and happy.

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